What is grief?

“What comes to mind when you hear the word grief?” That’s a question I like to ask my clients when they express deep feelings of despair. More than 90% of the time, I find my clients’ only answer to be: death. As their answer will always find validation, my clients will also find a more expanded explanation. Not only does grief happen when someone dies; however grief occurs when more circumstances cause us feelings of sadness and despair such as: the loss of friendships, relationships, dreams, expectations and much more. Once I provide a more expanded explanation regarding grief, I often I find myself sitting across faces that read confusion and relief. A way to expand this even more is by sharing a personal experience. I remember attending therapy when I was a teenager due to getting my heart broken. I remember feeling a sense of guilt by comparing my broken heart to mourning, causing me additional feelings of confusion. It wasn’t until my therapist explained the stages of grief and validated my feelings by informing me that what I was experiencing was grief.
Thanks to my personal experience, I find it very important to be able to educate my clients regarding this topic. The five stages of grief are: depression, anger, denial, bargaining and acceptance. Now, you can bounce from the four different stages in a non- orderly fashion; however, the final one will always be acceptance.
Now, the best way to cope with grief, is giving yourself grace, surround yourself with a healthy support system, adopting healthy coping skills and of course therapy. Let’s take care of ourselves and start that healing process!